25 accomplishments from year 25

I can't believe I'm 26 now! It's weirdly crazy to me that I've existed for this long. For our birthday, my dearest friend and birthday twin sent me Sleeping at Last's Saturn. I was very grateful to be reminded of the majestic song and of these humbling words that always make me teary: "How rare and beautiful it is to even exist." 

For me, it can be annoyingly easy to forget the beauty of life, especially when I'm struggling with feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt. To counter these feelings, I work constantly on celebrating the good and happy things I get to experience, particularly any little or big milestones I accomplish. So, here I am–for the first post in two years–celebrating 25 accomplishments from year 25 (with some final words at the end, of course!).

1. graduated BYU 

2. left BYU feeling grateful and proud for the growth experienced there 

3made friends during my final semester

4. studied for the MCAT in a way I felt was healthy and fulfilling

5. took the MCAT 

6. reached my MCAT score goal

7. applied to med school 

8. went to my first kpop concert (Seventeen, ily....even tho I saw you from the nosebleeds)

9. paid for med school apps by myself

10. mastered the flow in a part of Shong Lee’s song

11. work(ing) in a fulfilling job centered on people

12. visited NYC (Adrizzle, ily)

13. learned STATA

14. cleaned my research data 

15. got my own health insurance (before I was kicked off my parents'! amazing!)

16. became a mom to a 2 year old (Snowy, i love you!!!)

17. ran a 5k (with my mom!)

18. made a vision board for my wall (anything you can pick out?)

19. felt comfortable and confident at Max’s wedding 

20. gave a wedding speech that made ppl laugh (and myself cry, of course)

21.  cooked my first thanksgiving dinner (did cornish hens instead tho because I ignorantly left my turkey out to dethaw in my car's trunk for a few days oopsyyy)

22. got better at articulating my needs

23. was a niam tsev for one meal and cooked a whole Hmong meal for a mix of family and strangers but mostly strangers that were family

24. taught Snow and Benny how to play hide and seek

25. had fun with Max and Polo in Canada

No matter who you are or where you are in life, I hope you're taking the time to celebrate you. At the very least, I hope you are proud of yourself for simply existing. Life can be hard and tiring, so existing in and of itself is an accomplishment. And it's because you are enough! I know that to my core. 

And to anyone and everyone who has ever contributed time and love to who I am and what I do (including reading this post), thank you. I get to exist each and every single day because of you. 

23 selfies from year 23

Preface: honestly, 23 sucked a lot!!! I had a really hard time feeling loved and feeling happy and myself. I lost a lot of energy and heart during year 23 even way before COVID hit, and that sucked so bad. And as much as it sucked, I have yet to overcome some of these feelings--whatever they are! So, whatever these feelings are, they're coming with me into year 24. But don't worry. I'm hopeful! Why? Because even among all that suckyness, there were moments of good and happiness. Here are some of those moments captured in 23 selfies:

1. I was super stoked to go back to Sac for the temple sealing of one of my most favorite people ever. Basically failed a Biochem test because I left Provo so fast, but it was SO worth it! (11/23/2019)

2. 3/4 of my siblings and I went to this random shopping center one day. There was a giant pond in the back with ducks and fish. We walked to Walmart and bought one 98 cent bag of bread and fed the fish. They were SO hungry they jumped so so so much! One of my favorite memories with my siblings!! (12/21/2019)

3. Cutie doggo Cocco. I didn't realize that this break would be my last one with her. She was always one of my favorite parts of going home. (12/22/2019)

4. During fall semester of last year, I somehow lost 5 pounds??? I realized it was because of my poor eating habits and so on this particular winter day, I was super stoked to have made some chili and cornbread!! (12/31/2019)

5. Facemasks. The first night I had really hung out with this group of people and it was much much needed. They remain some of my favorite people!! (1/31/2020)

6. I carried this bag of M&Ms around with me for....awhile haha (2/10/2020)

7. Okay LITERALLY this was the greatest tender mercy. For some reason, I've always always always wanted one of these silver tin food carriers (like literally since childhood!!). After hearing about the random hidden desire of mine, my Mom bought one for me. Seriously it was such a happy day. Basically every day, I used it to pack my lunch and some snacks to campus...and then, one day...I lost it. I was SO SAD. And then after a couple of weeks of being sad, I made it to the campus lost and found and THEY HAD IT. This pic is the happy aftermath!! (2/27/2020)

8. From September 2019-March 2020, I got to be an administrative intern for a local hospital. I worked in the ED and rounded on patients and their families. From this experience, I realized firsthand how super duper important it is to keep patients happy. Overall, it was a really cool experience and I'm so grateful I got to do it. I miss it!!! (3/16/2020)

9. Another happy meal pic (3/18/2020)

10. Came home in late March because of COVID-19! Home is almost always the happiest place for me, and it was extra extra nice this time because I got to be there for over five months! The longest time I've been back since my mission. But ALSO it was super cool being home because we got chickens!!! I became a huge chicken mom this summer. One of the best things! (5/5/2020)

11. Proud to show off the happy corner I made in my room (5/1/2020)

12. Dad ate his lunch in the car and seeing him eat so happily makes me happy!!!! (5/28/2020)

13. NC sunsets are my favorite sunsets (6/24/2020)

14. I got this shirt from Goodwill YEARS ago and rarely get to wear it :---((( So, when I do get the opportunity, I take pics. This pic was from this biennial wearing of the shirt!! Also, this pic is from a weekend when my sibs and I went to the NC coast. It was fun to just be with them doing two of our favorite family past-times: bickering and fishing! (7/26/2020)

15. Ma and Pa dropped me off in Provo. I cried. (8/31/2020)

16. This day was the first day that it was cool in Provo!!! So naturally, my classic hoodie came out to play. Happy day!! (9/8/2020)

17. Max and Polo came to UT! It was each of our first times going to Zion's and it was v cool! (9/13/2020)

18. TMI but I had--am still having???--some skin issues. My saintly friends let me borrow their bathtub to take an oatmeal bath. They even cleaned the tub for me beforehand!! As I laid in the tub, I thought to myself, "Dang, I am so freaking loved." So. So. SO. Grateful. (9/25/2020)

19. 2AM pic after finally getting a presentation turned in!! I was pretty stressed this week, and this image is the end of it. Can you see the pure relief and happiness on my face?? (10/18/2020)

20. First time voter!!!!! Happy day!! Grateful for the opportunity to use my voice and especially grateful for all those who fought for their voices so that I could use mine today. Yay democracy yay liberty yay empowerment!! (10/30/2020)

21. I just really like this sweater (11/10/2020)

22. First time I ran in like months...and it felt so good afterwards!! Yay for 15 minute runs! Also, peep the $10 wireless earphones I got from Target! (11/19/2020)

23. Birthday dinner was this dang good burger from CHOM. It was a very chill day with a mix of studying, good food, and friendship. My roommate Kat watched not one but TWO rom-coms with me--how I love her so!! These are my favorite kind of days!!! (11/21/2020)

summer 2019: top 5 captures

5. fishing for joy
Growing up, my family always went fishing. This summer, for whatever reason, I felt the greatest desire to fish again. And so I did!!! And it brought me the greatest joy. Fishing, to me, epitomizes home. And this summer, it epitomized me doing whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted simply because I wanted to. 
This summer, fishing taught me that a lot a lot of power comes as we just go out and do whatever we want, especially when it’s spontaneous. 

4. Grand Tetons
I got the privilege and joy to go with my friends to visit the Grand Tetons in Wyoming. AND BOY OH BOY WAS IT BEAUTIFUL. This trip meant a lot to me for a lot of different reasons, but the greatest reason of all is that it was a moment in which I overcame one of my weaknesses. I feel like I really suck sometimes at following through! I’m a “big idea” kind of gal who has lots of cool ideas, but I really suck at being disciplined enough to carry them out. 
And SO, this trip meant a lot to me because it taught me the power and joy that comes as we (1) express whatever random thing we want to do, (2) gather together a wonderful, beautiful group of people to participate in the grand adventure, (3) plan the logistics (but not too many of them!!!), (4) follow through with the plans, and (5) just sit back, relax, and actually enjoy the freedom that comes with going on a grand adventure with even grander company. Such happy times and happy lessons! 

3. corn doigs
Another experience that epitomized my summer: goofy friends doing goofy things that we always joke that we’ll regret later but never actually do. It’s really easy to joke about regretting indulging in Sonic’s 50cent corn dogs on a random summer day but harder to actually regret it when you’re laughing at the spontaneity and yolo-ness of it all. This moment was just a really great one because truly and sincerely, none of us really cared at all. We didn't care about how silly it was that we paid for the corn dogs and mozz sticks with ten dollars worth of coins, and we definitely didn’t care about how gross society might deem corn dogs to be. 
It was an awesome moment of NOT CARING because we were doing it for us. And that’s one thing I feel more inspired to do because of this summer: be free to be who you are—seriously, just give no dang’s because life is too short to care about what others think.

2. snuggles with Cocco
This year, Cocco had a few health scares and it was quite terrifying and sad!!! We considered putting her down a few times, and each time, I was basically down for the day haha. SO it made me so so so happy to be home for a few weeks to be with my baby doggie. Though she’s still a bit bitter towards me about leaving her and still favors Maxine, there were moments when she would cuddle with me. Personally, I think it’s because she’s getting old and a bit too tired to care to be mad, BUT I’m not complaining!! So I’m soaking in all that love and cuteness while I can. 

1. the best company
I just really love this pic. More than I love this pic tho, I love Maxine. Maxx really is just one of the greatest human beings ever. No words can honestly describe what and who she is to me!!! BUT besides her, the sunset is pretty sick in the back!! I third-wheeled with Maxx and Polo to Florida, and it was a chill time. 
As much as I love the two though, one of my favorite moments was when I was by myself, listening to the chillest Novo Amour, dancing around in the waves, getting my legs wet, and flicking water around with my toes. That moment taught me that even with all the good things and good people that accompany me in life, I myself am some pretty great company. 

11/5 my time in Sac (almost two years later)


For the past almost two years since returning home, I’ve thought a lot about what I was going to write in this post-mission post. As I sit here finally actually writing it and revising it (in what will most definitely be in separate settings), I still honestly don’t know what to say. Originally, I was going to compile a video of mission videos to go along with this post, but while I was trying to compile it, I lacked a lot of inspiration and desire to actually do it. I finally asked myself why I lacked the inspiration, and then I realized that it was because I felt like there were very few little videos that I could use that actually showed and told the story of what my mission means to me. And so, I scratched that idea and opted for a lotta lotta words instead.

To begin, I guess I’ll answer that question: What does your mission mean to you, Cassey? What part of it makes it so sacred and so special to you?
And the answer’s pretty easy: it’s about how I came to know my Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ. Everything else about my mission is still a bit hard for me to articulate and really comprehend, but I thought I’ll write a bit about it anyways. And so, this post will be a bit scattered, but in hopes of being a bit more organized, I’m gonna use headlines and guiding questions and bullet points!

How was your mission?
  • - Truth: this is one of the hardest questions for me to answer because I’m really actually still processing what exactly happened those eighteen months…a lot a lot happened!!! And even with the things that I have processed, it’s hard to truly articulate my experience. 
  • - Cop-out, easier, default answer that is true despite how shallow it may seem: it was so so so good for me. I learned a lot about priorities and people and love and judgement and compassion and agency. I learned so much. One of the best decisions I’ve ever made to date.
What did you do in Sacramento?
  • (I really gotta figure out how to articulate this a bit better because I’ll inevitably be asked about those eighteen months for jobs and med school interviews) 
  • - The easy answer: I did service. Volunteered at a food bank. Raked some leaves. Visited people in care facilities. Sang at old folks’ homes. 
  • - Truth: I talked to people about Jesus Christ. Missionaries like to say that they have a front-row seat to seeing people receive Jesus Christ into their lives, and they do! I did. You may or may not agree with me, but Jesus changes lives. From Him, people can develop hope and change. Jesus empowered me so much on my mission and continues to to this day. 
What did you learn? (note that this is definitely not all-inclusive list!)
  • - I learned just how good Jesus is. How good our Father in Heaven is. They’re both so. dang. good. Every time I stop to think about it, Their goodness just boggles my mind. every. single. time. More on this later! 
  • - I learned how happy the Spirit makes me. Before my mission, I felt the Spirit every now and then when He would guide and comfort me. It was a good feeling, but on my mission, the Spirit was insane. I remember one day I tried to count the number of times I prayed that day, and I remember it being more than thirty times…which is about one prayer every thirty minutes. And maybe you normally pray more than me as a missionary, but that was defo a LOT more than pre-mish Cassey prayed. And each time I prayed, I asked Heavenly Father for the Spirit. So about 30 times a day for 18 months, I was asking for the Spirit to be with me. And so He was. He guided my every move. He led me to people who needed to be loved. He led me to read specific scriptures with specific people. He led me to think and say exactly what people needed to hear to be comforted. When I followed the Spirit, I was able to help people feel loved. When I was able to do that, I felt joy. The greatest, happiest kind of joy that pumps you up and sends you on a high. The kind that makes you feel like nothing else matters. On my mission, I learned how much I not only needed but wanted the Spirit in my life. It quickly came to be my greatest desire, and it still is! So. Grateful. 
  • - I learned that people have agency, the freedom to choose. And that no matter what they choose—whether, to us, it seems like the most right or the most wrong decision ever—they are still worthy of being loved. That Heavenly Father’s love for them is not conditional on their choices: He loves them all the same. And we should love in the same way! I learned that we should love people even when their choices might disappoint us. Because that’s what love really is. 
  • - I learned that people really are just a product of their experiences. I felt like before my mission, it was really easy for me to judge others for their actions and opinions. I would think “wow I can’t believe that person thought [insert random thing]. that’s kinda dumb!” On my mission, I came into contact with so many people from so many different backgrounds who often had entirely different life experiences. As I talked with each person and got to really know them, I could see why they thought and believed the things that they did. Realizing that really helped me to be more compassionate about the choices they made and the thoughts that they had. Ultimately, I learned that it is only when we genuinely talk to people and seek to understand them that we can love them. And not just the surface-level kind-of-love but the deep “dang, you’re pretty special” kind-of-love. The same kind of love that God has for each of us. He sees us for who we are! We can see others for who they truly are when we just talk and really try to connect with them. 
How are God and Jesus “so dang good?”
  • - honestly, They just are!!!! Really!! But here, I can expand just a smidge: 
  • - Missions aren’t easy. They can actually be quite hard!!!! I remember a lot of times feeling sad or discouraged or scared or stressed and then saying a prayer and just feeling all of those negative feelz melt away. And not just melt away for just a moment but for a long while. When I felt the bad feels, all I had to do was remember that peace and it came back to me. I know of Heavenly Father’s goodness because each time I reached out in prayer, I was comforted. The problems didn’t always go away, but I felt enough peace and confidence to keep moving forward. And to me, that meant more than anything. 
  • - There are no such things as coincidences. For eighteen months, I would start my day off with scripture study and then go out to teach and talk with people. So so so many times—too many times to count!!!—I got to talk to a random stranger who benefitted from something I had studied earlier that day. And it definitely wasn’t because I just thought they needed it but because they really did (usually revealed to me through their agreeable nods and wow’s or the quiet peace that was shared between us). There were just way way way too many times that something I had read was able to be used to help someone else. I know that that’s not because I’m a special fortune-teller-type-person but because God is real. And more than that single fact, it’s because He is aware of what each and every single one of His children—each and every single one of us—needs. It is through others that He is able to fulfill our needs. God truly is our Heavenly Father. He loves us and knows us. He knows ME. And that love feels so so so dang good. 
  • - So many times I met people who were disappointed in themselves because of the choices that they’ve made. And honestly SAME because so many times I too felt overwhelmed by my imperfections. In those hard moments—moments that I still have now as well, actually!!—it was super duper easy to get down on myself and kinda just wallow in that awfulness. BUT I really came to know that Jesus Christ not only died for our sins but died so that we can become better human beings. He didn’t sacrifice His life for us just so that one day, when we die, we can be resurrected and made pure. He sacrificed His life for us so that we can be made better NOW. All we have to do is ask for His help through prayer. I have felt SO empowered by Jesus Christ and by the faith that I have in Him. He has helped me to forgive myself and be kinder to Cassey Cha. And for that and more, Jesus is so dang good. 
  • - BASICALLY, I can go on and on. But I won’t because this is already a really long blog post. But really, know that I love my Heavenly Father. And I love His Son Jesus Christ. They really are just so so SO good to me. And to you too. You just have to look! 
A final take-away from the mish that just now came to mind as I finish this post is this: life can freaking suck. Half of the time, I feel like I’m pretty dang great and awesome and doing happy things. The other half the time, I get overwhelmed with hard things. Those hard things include but are not limited to the following: injustice, feelings of inadequacy, people being dismissive either to me or others, people just being jerks, not feeling understood, feelings of inadequacy, how healthcare in America can kinda suck???, how some people have access to great care because they have money and others are left to fend for themselves, hard science classes, feelings of inadequacy. Man, the list goes on (lol because as I wrote that list, I started feeling overwhelmed again hahaha). But really, I get overwhelmed by a lot. BUT BUT BUT—and this is the kicker—through it all, I am so so so dang grateful that because of Jesus Christ and His infinite love and goodness and power, each and every single one of those things (both listed and not listed) will one day cease to matter or even exist. I don’t know how, but I know it will happen. I have the greatest hope in that day when, because of Jesus Christ, all will be made right.

So the real final take-away is this: yes, life can freaking suck........but Jesus makes it easier. He understands my struggles, and He empowers me—legit gives me strength—to push the overwhelming things aside and keep moving forward. That moving forward often and most surely comes with lots of crying, emotional spirals, whining, and complaining, but it comes nonetheless.

And it comes nonetheless because of Jesus. He is so good, and I love Him. So. Freaking. Much.

6/12 mission farewell

Good morning, Brothers and Sisters! My name is Cassey Cha, and on Wednesday, I will have the pleasure of basically changing my first name to Sister for eighteen months as I serve the wonderful people of the California Sacramento mission. I am so so so very excited.
Before I begin my talk, I just want to thank my family, my friends, my seminary teachers, and my leaders for their patience and kindness with helping mold me into the person I am today. And thank you, Newton-Conover ward, for being constant examples of Christ and always so loving. Without you all, I would not be here at this pulpit today. I know that without a shadow of a doubt! For that reason, I’d like to invite anyone interested to the tiny lunch my wonderful wonderful mom and other Relief Society sisters have prepared for us after church today in the gym. Now, for the talk!
For me, this decision has been a long time coming. Ever since I was fourteen, I’ve known that I wanted to serve a mission. I was at EFY, and I just felt—I knew—that a mission was something Heavenly Father needed me to do. So ever since then, everything’s been fine and dandy because I was mission-bound. Just kidding—that’s a joke! All throughout high school, going on a mission was always on my list of plans, but it took me awhile to figure out the exact time to go. After more than a year’s worth of prayers and discussions with my family, I finally made the decision. I started my papers in January, and within three weeks, they were submitted and, eventually, I got my call. And now, here I am!
Today, I want to talk about why I am going on a mission. Sure, I just mentioned that I felt and knew that it was something Heavenly Father wanted me to do…but sometimes feelings can change. And they have, so I want to take a minute to talk about that change.
I don’t know about y’all, but I think going on a mission is a pretty big deal. Making that decision is a big deal. Spending a year and a half doing something entirely different from what most (if not all) of my peers are doing…that’s a big deal. You’re probably thinking I’m being really dramatic, like “Cassey…eighteen months isn’t a big deal at all.” But it is! It’s a big deal because I’m young. I’m sure that at the end of my life, these eighteen months will be a tiny dent in my life time-wise. They won’t be a big deal then, but for now, let’s do some calculations… So I’m currently 19, planning to spend 1.5 years of my life preaching the gospel… By the time I’m done serving, I’ll be 21. So up to that point of my life—divide 21 by 1.5—multiply by 100—14—that’s 14% of my life spent as a sister missionary. 14% of my life spent not dating and not getting married. 14% of my life not going to school and not being anywhere closer to med-school. Sounds pretty tragic, right? And like everything else in the world, it can be…but it depends how you look at it. I choose to look at it this way…By the time I’m 21, I would have spent 14% of my life as a missionary. If I do my job right, that’s 14% of my life spent serving others. 14% of my life loving others a lot more than loving myself. Most importantly, 14% of my life doing everything that my Heavenly Father not only wants me to do but needs me to do.
So, going back to my original point: feelings change. But these feelings have changed in a way that I could have never imagined. Almost four years later, the initial feeling of “Oh, I need to go on a mission” has evolved into a one-hundred-percent-sure decision that, to and for me, has both worldly and spiritual merit.
First, let’s talk about the worldly (and temporal) merit of going on a mission. Easy! I don’t have to go to school for a year a half, meaning no exams. That’s pretty awesome. Just kidding, I actually genuinely enjoy school, but moving on…
Let’s talk about the spiritual merit of going on a mission. Keep in mind that because missions are spiritual in nature, they have eternal value. One of my favorite scripture verses of all time is D&C 18:10: “Remember, the worth of souls is great in the sight of God.” Out of context, this verse is a powerful reminder that everyone, including myself, is important in God’s eyes and should, therefore, be important in my own. In context, however, this scripture (in addition to verses 11-16) speaks of the eternal blessing of doing missionary work: “Remember, the worth of souls is great in the sight of God; For, behold, the Lord your Redeemer suffered death in the flesh; wherefore he suffered the pain of all men, that all men might repent and come unto him. And he hath risen again from the dead that he might bring all men unto him, on conditions of repentance. And how great is his joy in the soul that repenteth! Wherefore, you are called to cry repentance unto this people. And if it so be that you should labor all your days in crying repentance unto this people, and bring, save it be one soul unto me, how great shall be your joy with him in the kingdom of my Father! And now, if your joy will be great with one soul that you have brought forth unto me into the kingdom of my Father, how great will be your joy if you should bring many souls unto me!” We are told that if we can turn just one person to repentance and Christ, we will be blessed immensely in the kingdom of heaven.
So, if you ever doubted it before (which hopefully you haven’t), going on a mission definitely has its merits. I will be blessed for my time spent as a missionary, and I think that’s really neat. But…that’s not why I’m going. I’m not going on a mission so that I can get the temporal and eternal blessings of going on a mission. Because if I was going on a mission just for the blessings I could receive, I might as well not be going on one at all. And why is that? Because it would mean that I had missed the entire point of going on a mission which is: to serve others and bring them unto Christ.
I am going on a mission not because I will be blessed for my efforts but because I love this gospel and I love people. And just like when I discover a new show that I love, I share it with those around me, I too want to share this gospel with anyone and everyone around me. I love this gospel more than anything in the world; it brings me the greatest peace and joy. And I think it’s only fair that I share it with others—to try my best to make sure everyone not only has a chance to hear about it but to also experience it for themselves and to reap its temporal and eternal blessings. And not only is it “fair” that I share it, but it is actually my duty. And, it’s yours, too! The Lord commands us in D&C 88:77, saying, “I give unto you a commandment that you shall teach one another the doctrine of the kingdom.” In verse 81, He continues, saying that “it becometh every man who hath been warned to warn his neighbor.” Because we are privileged enough to have knowledge of the true gospel, it is our duty to share it, especially with those who are less privileged.
And to each of us, the gospel means something different, and by that I mean that it’s important to all of us for different reasons. For the rest of my talk, I want to share with y’all what the gospel means to me and why I choose to be a member of this church. This is the message that I want to share with the world, especially the people of California, as I embark on my mission. And more importantly, it is what I want others to have in and for their own lives.
The gospel of Jesus Christ is the greatest constant I have in my life. It is the greatest reminder that there is a God, one that loves us and is our Heavenly Father. His love is incomprehensible. Growing up, my mom always told me that despite all of my flaws and bad attitudes and tantrums, she would always love me. She taught me about the unconditional love that mothers can have for their children. I like to say that I have this same type of love for my dog Cocco, but I can only imagine what it really feels like until I have children of my own. And even then, I think I’ll find it quite unfathomable. Regardless, I have felt my mom’s unconditional love for me my entire life, and I am so grateful for it because I promise you all, I am a problem child. I can be rude and selfish and far from perfect, but my patient and kind mom has always forgiven me (I hope! You don’t have any grudges against me, do ya, Mama?). I know that our Father in Heaven feels the same way about us. He is perfect and all-powerful, and His love is only more so.
While away at college, I have come to realize that God’s love can be found in literally every single good thing on Earth. D&C 59:18-19 puts this very simply, reading, “Yea, all things which come of the earth, in the season thereof, are made for the benefit and the use of man, both to please the eye and to gladden the heart; yea, for food and for raiment, for taste and for smell, to strengthen the body and to enliven the soul.” He loves us, so He gives us the Earth and everything on it for our benefit. Even on our bad days—I would argue especially on our bad days—as long as we take time to look around us, we can feel God’s love. After a long week of cramming for finals in the dead of winter, I have felt this love as I stepped outside and felt the miraculous sunshine on my face.
The gospel is a constant in my life for another reason: it reminds me that I am never alone. The same EFY summer I decided to serve a mission, my testimony was strengthened exponentially by my dad’s. Before this point, he never really bore his testimony to me, and boy, had I been missing out. My dad testified to me that “he knew that Jesus Christ and God love us because they’re the only people we’re ever able to talk to all the time” (7/20/12 journal entry). I remember crying and being so happy because of that sentence, and over the years, I have only found it to be more and more true. On the good days and on the bad days, we are never alone. Both Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are only a prayer away! But in actuality, because they are supreme and omniscient beings, they are always with us. Furthermore, Heavenly Father gives us a promise in 1 Corinthians 10:13 that “[He] will not suffer [us] to be tempted above that [which we] are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that [we] may be able to bear it.” Our Father in Heaven knows us personally. He knows our strengths and our weaknesses, and He gives us whatever we need to overcome our trials and accomplish whatever He wants us to accomplish. In addition, we have our brother Jesus Christ to always strengthen us. Matthew 11:28 teaches us that He gives rest to all those who come unto him and are heavy laden. Because of Him, we are not ever left comfortless.
Another reason why the gospel is the greatest constant in my life is because I am imperfect. I do not keep the commandments as diligently as I know I can. Sure, I try, but I am human, and I mess up. But because of the gospel, I know that I can one day become perfect like my Savior Jesus Christ. I can one day reach my fullest potential, but I can only accomplish this seemingly impossible goal through Christ’s Atonement. When Christ was on Earth, He was the greatest example to us. He bore the sins of the world in the garden of Gethsemane and died for us on the cross so that we, too, can return to live with our Father in Heaven. He did all of this so we can be redeemed and forgiven through repentance and faith in Him—so that we can ultimately have eternal life in exaltation. Because of Him, I can live forever in a state of never-ending happiness.
All of this knowledge of the gospel that I’ve talked about today (and so much more, really!!) brings me an immense amount of joy and peace. It fills me with so much love for the world and the people and things in it. Without the gospel, I would probably just be in bed all day crying about how awful the world can be. But, thankfully, because of this gospel and the truth that it brings, I am not. I know that, in the end, everything will be as Heavenly Father planned it to be and that good and light and happiness will win. And I think that’s really really really awesome.
So basically what I’m saying is that this gospel—this church—makes me the happy person that I am today. And nowadays, the world needs more happy people. And I know that this gospel, more than anything else in the world, can lead a person to eternal happiness.
In conclusion, I am serving a mission for this church, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, because I want others to have the same joy and peace and love and knowledge that I have. I want others to know that everything will eventually be okay because they have a Heavenly Father and a savior, Jesus Christ, who loves them and cares for them more than anyone can imagine—that the Holy Ghost speaks to us in a still, small voice—that the Book of Mormon is true—that we have modern-day prophets guiding us today—that we can live with our families for ever and ever—that the Atonement is real and can help us become more perfect—and that our prayers will be answered even when we think they won’t be. Above all, I want others to know that this church, our church, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, is the only true church of God that we have on Earth today. I testify that through the Holy Ghost, I know all of this to be true.

6/6 second semester: top 5 captures

okay I'm gonna cheat and include some collages...pls forgive me 

5. Tunnel? ...more like FUN-HOLE

Taken by the dearest Brenton circa 2 AM. There's a tunnel that basically goes from one bottom of College Hill to the other, and it's officially only for buses and police...but imagine: after a day of hardcore jamming at Spring Weekend and a night of other shenanigans, who wants to walk up a hill at two in the morning? No one. So, my tired friends and I took it upon ourselves to walk through the tunnel. We sang and appreciated the acoustics, observed interesting wall graffiti, and enjoyed our impulsively-purchased Seven-Eleven ICEES in each others' company. BTW, the pic on the left is our attempt at a chill hipster pic, and the pic on the right is me ruining it with my announcement that I really had to pee...All in all, this was a fun adventure, and I look back on this night (and day) with the fondest of memories! Thanks for those who played a part in it :-)

4. CraZAY for SydNAY

After Sydney's adorable and amazing Kpop dancing in the culture show, we took these fan pics (courtesy of Sarah). Sarah's craziness and humor made these pics so much better than I could have imagined. The blurry aesthetic epitomizes our friendship. Sarah's always cracking us up with her antics, Sydney's always being adorable, and I'm just taking it all in. They remind me to take myself and others less seriously and teach me to become a better lover of life and appreciator of friendship. I'm so grateful for them!

3. Tinashe Bae

Taken during Tinashe's FREAKING AMAZING performance. Bae seriously killed it. I have never been so wowed!! Tinashe is a beautiful human being, and I had so much fun jamming to her with some of my favorite people by my side. (Also, can we take a second to appreciate Kobe to the left of me? Such a lover of life and so freaking smart and wise I cannot even deal.) Unpictured is Sarah to the right of me seriously and quite literally freaking going HAM to Tinashe. Spring Weekend, man.

2. UnNecessary Dinners
Pretty much everyone on this dinner date was done with exams except me (I had one more the day after that I had barely studied for), and I really should have been studying instead of grabbing a nice dinner with my friends. But whatever because it was so freaking worth it. I think it's so important for us to remind ourselves of what makes us happy. For me, it's my friends (more so than my grades, at least), and I needed to prioritize them in the moment, especially knowing that I wouldn't be returning in the fall. I encourage everyone to do that! Always prioritize what makes you happy. Now. Enough with the philosophical talk. I freaking love the humans above. I wish I had more chances to hang out with all of them a bit more during the year, but I'm so grateful for each of them! Also, in the bottom left pic are Eddy and Marimar, two wonderful humans that won't be at Brown when I return. Oh, how I'll miss them so!! Such bright and beautiful human beings.

1. Reunited and it feels so Freaking Good

MY FAVORITE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD CAME TO MY FAVORITE PLACE IN THE WORLD, AND IT WAS AWESOME. I seriously love my Mama and my Sister so freaking much, and I'm so happy they were able to come pick and pack me up. Not to mention this day was a particularly beautiful day and I had just finished my last exam (and therefore, freshman year)!! It was so bittersweet saying a "see ya later" to my year-long home, but I'm so freaking happy to be done with exams and reunited with my favorite people that I can't even be mad or sad. Thanks for an amazing year, Brown, but the greatest thanks to these two for always being so kind, understanding, and encouraging--basically for being the foundation of my entire life and the greatest support system a girl could ask for. I couldn't have made it through this year without y'all. 

6/1 my corner of Brown

Before heading up to Brown, I, a Pinterest-home-decor-loving, loved looking at the dorms of other people and pinning so many cute decor ideas. It was fun stuff! At the end of the day though, I never got too invested in the idea of having the "cutest" dorm. I knew I would be kicked out of the dorm at the end of the year and would more than likely be leaving for my mission anyways (which happened to be true!), so I tried super hard not to pack too much stuff to have to lug back to NC. After all, what comes up, must come down, right?
So, without further adieu, here was my humble abode...my own lil corner of Brown University.
A thing about the last photo: while at Brown, I was a part of a program called Swearer Teaching and Enrichment in Math and Sciences (STEMS). These are the name tags from that experience. 

For anyone wondering where to get any of this stuff or something similar...
Comforter - Kohls (it was a super cheap 8-piece set!)
Pink fluffy blanket - Target
Lights - Michaels (lights here are the best)
Lamp - idk, but I covered it with Washi tape and found it quite cool
Wall quote - letters from recycled paper
Picture frames - WalMart and Goodwill
Foil letter "C" - DIY with aluminum foil and cardboard
Temple canvas art - DIY (I'm quite proud of this because of my lack of artistic ability)

"But seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you." -1 Nephi 13:33
© chasing cassey
Maira Gall